Goodbye to a friend

I promise to write ALL about our harrowing wedding day, but not this minute.

Right now, I’d like to give a moment to my dear friend Brian Goins who died today of cancer (related to HIV). He’s not the first friend I’ve lost to HIV, but he’s the most dear. I knew this was coming so I was ready for it and I’m glad it’s over to tell the truth. Brian was a vibrant, sexy, fun and caring friend and I’ll miss him.

I’ve not seen Brian in quite some time, but we’ve stayed in touch with the phone, chat and email. The last time we spoke, we talked about how he wanted his death handled and we pretty much said our goodbyes. It was about 4 months ago. The doctors had just told him that they could do nothing more for him and we both knew it was only a matter of time. Brian was worse at goodbye than I am, so we never said it. I know that’s the way he wanted it. I also know that he didn’t want to burden any of us friends with his dying — which is why he simply stopped talking to us. It’s his way and I’m good with that.

I’ll be heading to Knoxville next week for his [horrible, Southern, look-at-the-body-and-gasp] service and then he’ll be cremated. At least his bitch of a mother agreed to that. I know for a fact that he did not want a service, much less a VIEWING fer chrissakes, but he gave in to his mother at the end to please her. I don’t know what is wrong with that woman, but I hope she reaps lots of bad karma for overriding her ONLY son’s wishes. I’m sure she’ll get what she deserves.

Although Brian and I didn’t spend much time together in the last few years (he lived in New York), I will miss him. He is an old soul, however, so I’m quite certain we’ll meet again. I look forward to it.

Hey, Bri, meet me at the closest bar next time around, ok? I love ya, sweetie darling. Don’t forget the champagne and nibblies!