How Much is Enough?

God, so much has been going on…As you know from the blog, Apple contacted me over a week ago. I haven’t gotten anything more from the slacker HR guy since, but I plan to shake his cage again this week. We (Andy, Nick and me) attended a big soiree for the new Atlanta office of last Thursday. [Interesting sidebar: Marchfirst went bankrupt in 2011. Another dot bomb.-Aug 2013] It was great fun and I made some cool contacts. I originally hooked up with them via a guy in the HR dept. who sent AMUG an email about the opening party. From there, I ended up being a VIP (!!) at the party! Too cool! I was not too interested in this company until I found out that they are the ones that do 90% of the marketing for Apple. Chiat/Day just does print – THESE guys do everything else! They came up with the iMac design fer cryin out loud! Now, it is my mission to get a job with them, if Apple does not hire me, that is. Both companies have bases in Cupertino CA, so I think now is the time to be persistent and get myself a real job at a company that I am enamoured with.

My age has been a topic of discussion a lot lately. Not in a bad way, but in a “God I’m glad I’m not in my 20’s any more!” sort of way. I had lunch with Dean yesterday and we talked about it because he just had a birthday on the 24th. And he will *always* be older than me!! Yay! :-) OK, yes, I’m not in my 20’s. And I’m damn glad, so there.

I’ve acquired some web work. One client is thru an agency (or should I say was?) and although the work is tedious, I’m happy to have it. The other gig is thru (rocks!) but I’m not sure if I’ll actually get any work. The guy is not clear about what he wants to do or how much he wants to pay. Like clients *ever* know this. ARGH! “Oh, yes, Mr. Client, I know exactly what you want and I’ll do it for exactly the amount you want to pay! And you don’t have to do or say *anything* at all! I’ll just whip out my crystal ball and divine it all for you!” //end sarcasm

It has come to my attention that some of you (you know who you are) seem to think that I do not spill enough of my emotional life onto the web. I talk about the things that are going on with me, but not much about my innermost feelings and thoughts because that’s the way I want this blog to be. Because of the delicate nature of my intimate relationships, I can’t get into the really *good* stuff here. You all READ this, you see, so it would not be fair to blab about one person or another in my close circle. So I don’t.

So, how much is enough? How much is too much? I could prolly have more relevant commentary about my life and how I feel about my life. I’m not much for public displays of angst or whatever, but I will try to muster up something more intimate. Lessee. OK, here’s a nugget: leaving my little nest here will be VERY difficult. Although I really hate Georgia, I really like my home: it’s comfy, my cats have freedom, I have a garden. Just the thought of leaving makes me very teary and upset. This place has been my haven for a long time and it matters to me. This is one very big source of angst for me right now.

It’s funny how ambivalence lurks in the corners of your mind. I can usually detect it in myself, but lately, I’ve discovered that I’m a LOT more ambivalent about many more things than I thought: love, jobs, friends, even what kind of beer to buy. I haven’t been doing yoga, or getting adjustments regularly, either. Nor have I thrown any (tarot) cards. Perhaps I’m just avoiding these things in order to avoid confronting the real issues of my life? A good point to ponder…

“Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering? Well, yes, Brain, but where are we gonna get a rubber hose and tutu at this time of night?”

No, I don’t know where that came from, either. Must be the onset of dementia…