Escape velocity is when you finally get enough juice behind your convictions that the Universe listens. Let me tell you, friends and neighbors, it AIN’T easy to come by.
Well, it’s not easy for me, anyway. There are people like my friend Darbi who decide to do something and the Universe immediately jumps right on it and voilà, they change everything. Painlessly, quickly, successfully. It’s enough to make me cry. And sometimes I do, but not for long, because what’s the point? All it does is run your mascara and glob up your contacts.
This last week has been a horror for me. I had a heinous contract job that has made me want to change my life path and never do another design or Mac job ever again. My mother calls to tell me that my oldest cat is dying and will be put down. A leak springs in my kitchen ceiling- from the tree damage, no doubt. My asshole neighbors kept me up until 2am today and I got about 4 hours of sleep prior to this day of travel.
I’m exhausted both emotionally and physically. I’ve cried a river for my cat this weekend and I am pretty sure that she’s gone now and it hurts, dammit. I didn’t have the chance to say goodbye.
So, here I am, in a plane, flying to San Francisco to attempt what now seems like the impossible: interview for a job so I can get away from all that stagnation in Georgia. What seemed like a great idea three weeks ago now seems like a silly, juvenile attempt to run away from my stupid little life so I can start up a new stupid little life somewhere else. What am I thinking?
I’m going to stop now. The fear and loathing is just too thick to get through. Maybe I’ll nap, if the vile rugrat behind me will stop kicking my goddam seat…
Next Day:
I’ve just returned from dowtown Mtn View. It’s a nice 1/2 hour walk and it’s fabulous outside today. All the locals think it’s a scorcher – which makes me laugh. Temps in the 80s are nothing to Southerners! I had wonderful chinese noodles for lunch at a place where I was the only white girl and it was CHEAP! Less than $5 for a huge bowl of noodles, broth, shrimp filled dumplings and broccoli greens. YUM!
My kitty was indeed put to sleep yesterday, but it was a good thing. She was in congestive heart failure due to hyperthyroidism and she was suffering. It hurts, but I’m glad she is not in any more pain. I know there is a kitty heaven where she hunts mousies every day and romps in the grass. Merry part, my littlest kitty Beeper. I’ll miss you.
As for me, I feel better today. I had a good nights sleep and some fresh air and I’m ready to look at Craigslist.org and see what sorts of jobs are out here.
That’s all for this Rant. I’m sure I’ll have more after this trip!