One step back.
Can’t win for losing.
I am so tired.
Tired of living paycheck to paycheck.
Tired of having to pick and choose who gets medical care (me, Nick, Shasti). I’d LIKE to give my cat every chance to live longer, but I guess that’s OUT since we can’t afford the meds and getting that rotten tooth pulled, which will poison her system. Awesome.
Tired of thinking things are looking up, only to have someone fuck it up.
Tired of dealing with fucking GERD issues. Can’t do a fucking thing about them but get through.
I’ve not had a vacay in over a decade. Not going to get one any time soon, either.
The investment fund is just an auxiliary savings acct. It is pulled from every other month. It will run out. Then what?
My hands keep me from f/t kitchen (hell, even P/T) kitchen work. My narrow skillset makes me unemployable. Awesome.
I feel 100% defeated. As usual.
We will work without a break until we die. No vacay. No nothing, just work.
I am typically maudlin this time of year, but this year is really bad. I doubt I will do much socializing. Don’t be offended if I pass on invites and/or don’t offer them.
I just need time to get through this. Give me space, I’ll be over it soon enough.