I was trying to figure out a way to say some things. Too late! Eh, well. I regret that I’m sometimes too slow to try to explain my explanations and assumptions are made and anger ensues. In the long run, my explanations are never accepted as real anyway, so I should probably just not ever say anything to anyone ever again. Too bad shutting up is not my strong suit.
Instead, I’ve created a handy list of all the horrible things I do regularly that you can use to ensure you are deleting me from your social networks properly! You can use this Butthurt Form to place complaints and please feel free to use this handy list and repost to others who have had the misfortune of dealing with me and my little black heart:
– If you think my asking questions and offering solutions is an attempt to hijack your life and/or control you for my devious purposes; Delete Me!
– If you think my decision to let someone go is easy and just drama for drama’s sake; Delete Me!
– If you think lying, duplicity and sneaking around is perfectly acceptable as long as it is towards your ends; Delete Me!
– If you think my opinions and/or advice is in any way offered as “my way or the highway”; Delete Me!
– If you think that my posting about events in my life to try and sort them out is obsessive and strictly for dramatic effect; Delete Me!
– If you think that shallow acquaintance is the same as friendship; Delete Me!
– If you think that I’m not allowed to return fire when snark is posted at me but it’s perfectly fine for you to do it; Delete Me!
– If you find my input bossy and meddlesome rather than me trying to help; Delete Me!
– If you think I’m The Decider and Nick is my ass monkey; Delete Me!
– If you think Nick is a spineless twit and shouldn’t be with a cunt like me; Delete Me!
– If you think I don’t listen to what is said and try hard to be a better person; Delete Me!
– If you think that sticking by my opinions means I don’t listen to other opinions; Delete Me!
– If you think nothing affects me and this is all just a game to me; Delete Me!
– If you think that I’m not a work in progress just like everyone else (including YOU); Delete Me!
And finally, if you think my black heart controls all Pestilence and Disease plaguing mankind, then DON’T Delete Me! You obviously know what all this shit is about.
I shall never ever delete you, even when I am dead.
I thought I was controlling pestilence and you were only doing disease this year though. ; )
Dang, you’re right! Does that include fleas, or are they separate? ;) Where’s Caroline? Wonder how tooth decay is doing?
Fleas are my area…But you can have the flying roaches if you would like.